incoherent babble.

I often wonder about the pain we inflict on each another. How do we justify the things we do? Whether it's the betrayal of cheating or something as deeply painful as ethnic cleansing...how are we able to sanely justify these things? I remember going through something emotionally painful once. The pain was so immense; I was positive that physical pain would be less painful. I even wished there was a way that people who intentionally and neglectfully inflicted emotional pain, were punished like those who physically hurt people. But in real life, physical pain can somewhat be quantified, I don’t think emotional pain can. I think those who hurt people without regard need rehabilitation like those who bruise and batter people.

A friend was going through something emotionally painful recently. She said she wished she could take out her heart and sit it somewhere so it could cool off. It sounds crazy, but I thought the statement was beautiful and made complete sense. Think about it.

There are times when emotional pain is so much; you need a physical way out.

I've accepted some things by remembering, some people do the best with what they know. If you don't know much, your "best" will be lacking - severely. Even if they know better, sometimes the ego interferes with whatever good sense they have left in their possession. The older I get and the more I listen to my intuition, I'm able to identify these people quicker. Sure, some of these things make us stronger. However, I think some of the pains are highly unnecessary, and not everyone can bounce back with a positive attitude. I’ve also learned that sometimes it’s hard to understand certain things people do, especially when your soul wouldn’t allow you to do such things.

in light of recent disaster..

please help haiti.

two simple ways. it'll only take a minute.

--> http://www.yele.org/ or text 'YELE' to '501501' and a donation will be made and charged to your cell phone bill.

--> www.state.gov or text 'HAITI' to '90999' a donation of $10 will be given automatically to the Red Cross to help with relief efforts, charged to your cell phone bill.

oxo

someone said..

better to do your dharma
horribly, than
someone else's well.

i just don't know exactly who. makes sense though.

think about it.

I've realized something.There are some people who feel too much or are extremely sensitive because of a hormonal imbalance. I get it, I do. Like, a pregnant woman who cries with the snap of a finger or a woman with her period who cries about things she wouldn't have cried about a week earlier. Personally speaking, I've done that bullshit and I'm sure a lot of you have too. Absolutely hate it. Then in retrospect you're like "Um, why the fuck was I crying?" But, there are these other kind of people. Those who feel no understanding, compassion, or remorse and are unresponsive to anything or anyone. Could it be said that they have a chemical imbalance as well? I mean, they're totally on the other end of the spectrum. They have a depth-less, almost non-existent capacity to feel emotion. Maybe you could say that these people have a chemical imbalance instead of whatever else excuse is used to describe their emotionless hearts. But then again, who's the judge of what's normal. I guess abnormal is when imbalances start to affect or hurt those without the actual imbalance.

Make sense?

pardon my back.

i've been spending most of my nights lately curled up in the bed with my laptop, a good book or the book i’m editing. it’s a huge project so it’s taking up a lot of my time. as winter approaches, i usually get very low key anyway, and it tends to affect all areas of my life - favorably, i'd like to think. i kinda like it like that. low activity keeps me balanced and calm at times. i'll pop in every now and then as inspiration strikes. in the meantime, check out ehug mag, we have new writers + tons of new content every week.

Hope you all have a happy holiday.

P.

why..

"...did you go natural?" is a question, i've recently encountered if i'm not being complimented, since going natural. i came across this poem by Jackie Joice while cyber-stalking natural hair sites (they've helped immensely) and loved how it listed in a nutshell a few of the reasons i decided to take this journey and experience my REAL hair.. for the first time in about twenty years.

Jackie why did you cut your hair?

I liked it the "other way"

Jackie are you going ill?

Jackie do you belong to a religious cult?

Jackie are you a lesbian?

I cut my hair because

I was tired of

frying

burning

cooking

crimping

chopping

cutting

curling

pulling

stretching

gelling

slicking

relaxing

perming

and spending.

That's why I cut my hair!

-Jackie Joice

hair idols.

Ayo, Afro-German Singer/Songwriter

Andrea Pippins of Fly

for now.

um yeah.

slight repost. sometimes people need reminders in the most subtle ways.

bitch.
1: the female of the dog or some other carnivorous mammals

2 a: a lewd or immoral woman b: a malicious, spiteful, or overbearing woman —sometimes used as a generalized term of abuse

3: something that is extremely difficult, objectionable, or unpleasant

4: complaint

I'm changing. The older I get, the more aggressive and assertive I've become in almost every area in my life. Demanding what I want quite frankly without the extra shit. Just because I’m strong minded, becoming a bit brutally honest and more assertive doesn’t make me a bitch. Don't get me wrong, those in my circle use the word loosely, which is cool. But I'm speaking to those who use it with malice. If someone approaches me in a certain manner I will reciprocate in the same manner. I’ll just be more effective at it. My threshold for ignorance and bullshit has decreased (finally), thus, leading to thoughts of me being a bitch. Those who know me, know I'm really not ... I'm actually very nice... in fact, I'm too nice. However, if being a bitch means handling my priorities well and making sure I get what I want deserve…then I guess I'm guilty. I will tolerate nothing but the best for me. Especially if I've earned it.

"When a woman is assertive and adamant about what she wants, she's totally branded a 'bitch,' 'difficult,' 'hard to work with,' or whatever the case may be. You know what? I'll take it. Call me a bitch, call me whatever, it doesn't matter." ~Kelis

essie 2009 winter collection.

from right to left: lollipop, rock candy, mint candy apple.


i want mint candy apple on my nails like yesterday.

♥.

via we heart it.

comments for 'free will'.

i don't usually repost comments left under my blog entries, but after reading these two from my free will post, I felt compelled, as they spoke volumes.

"The only thing we really have is free will. The will to think and do as we
please. The fact is that, that will is governed by experiences, preferences and moral values. That is our gift from God or whomever you believe. The
consequences of those choices and the thought and expectations of those
consequences heavily influence our free will. Integrity is what is lacking
now-a-days. The ability to maintain your moral values in the face of adversity. What is the sense of having or exercising free will with no integrity? Once you have to exercise free will with integrity you stand a true test. I think you are doing pretty frikkin well though lol."

and...

"Free will is also controlled by fear and motivation. You have the will
to change whatever it is that you want to; your actions, your situation etc. But are u afraid of the outcome or consequences that change will bring about? You don't know what the outcome will be. You rather remain in the comfort of the "known" than slip into the unknown. Why would you be motivated to exercise free will if you don't know whether your actions will affect your life positively or negatively? So you continue to live the same way even though you might want to change some things about your life. You might not like some of the things that you do but at least you know what the consequences of your actions are because you have dealt with them before. I believe that free will exist in every situation. It is a wonderful gift that allows us to succeed and fail so that we may learn and progress."

Good Stuff.

untitled: two.

we spoke again. i love being there for people i care about. i think she's at a point in her life where she's past the whole open relationship/dating phase. growing up, i was always taught not to settle. why is she settling for something that is not in her best interest? nor does it fit her lifestyle right now. i don't know what else to tell her. i mean, i can only give but so much advice. i remember us being young and into whatever dude fit our mood for that moment but we’ve definitely outgrown that.

…and the truth if she isn't comfortable with some of the things that occur and monogamy has become a little more attractive to her, she should let him know, or pursue it.