Picture this:
You're 5 years-old and your Dad comes home drunk and starts throwing shit, yelling and beating on your Mom for no reason at all - something that occurred more than it didn't. While you grow up, you see that he's around, but not around ... If you get my gist. You see him frequently & he spends time with you, takes you places, but financially, mentally and somewhat physically, your Mother is struggling. She is struggling to put you through a private Elementary/Junior High School. Suddenly at the age of 11, your Dad decides to move to another state with his new wife. So not only is he not around, but he is still not helping your Mom. But she manages to put you through Elementary, JHS, High School & College.
You're an adult now and although you don't see your Dad too much, you speak to him often but you speak to him with so much sincerity and affection - as if he wasn't abusive at one point in his life and as if your Mother wasn't struggling, crying, & complaining about how hard it was to support you by herself - amongst other things.
My question is: Where does this deep-rooted love some girls have for an incomplete father come from? I'm not saying they shouldn't love him, but some people resent their absentee parent. Is it because a child is incognizant to the direct & indirect pain a father sometimes causes a mother? Is it because most absentee parents spoil their kids? Is it because a child knows her father's love is genuine but sometimes their priorities just aren't in order? What about the dad's personality ... let's say he is one of those Cliff Huxtable funny, easy-going and fun to be around dads.. do you think that clouds judgement, leading a child to grow up never seeing through the smoke and mirrors act?
What about when mom and dad speak like they are best friends ... Does it mean she forgot or forgave? Or both?
I wanna know if anyone experienced this or has some sort of reasoning for why this is -- I know there's some psychology behind it, as there is with almost everything else.
